communication breakdown

My Final Answer

Well, after a long period full of many thoughts and prayers, I have finally made a decision regarding the job opportunity in Atlanta. Some of you saw my previous post and mistakenly assumed that I had made up my mind, when I very much hadn't decided yet. Though I was slightly leaning one way at the time, there was still plenty more to ponder.

What did I decide, you ask? Well, you didn't think I was going to say it right here on the main page, do you? You'll have to read further to see the answer... just a little technique I like to call "baiting the reader into checking out more of my self-indulgent ramblings"...

I decided to take the job. Most of my rationale is explained in my previous entry. In the end, it just felt like the job was answered prayer. God basically gave me an opportunity on a silver platter, and I found it too tempting to pass up.

I prayed about it in earnest for several days. I think I'm still learning how to trust God in those kinds of situations - obviously I would never think of demanding guidance from Him, for we are not worthy to make such requests. But what do you do when you are pressed for time on a situation, and you want to follow God's will, but he doesn't necessarily give you an answer "in time"? Do you pass over the opportunity, assuming that if He wanted you to take it, He would have told you? Or maybe when we ask for His help we can always count on Him to give us the answers we seek before it is too late? I'm still not exactly sure and would be interested in hearing other opinions on this. In the end though, practically in the last hours, the whole situation came to peace and it suddenly just felt like the right thing to do. That was when I made my final decision.

My boss and co-workers are pretty bummed, which only served to make me feel even more guilty about abandoning them so suddenly. Their reactions were pretty divided - some were totally caught off-guard, while a large portion of them were not surprised at all. I got a lot of "well that makes sense" and "I'm not really that surprised" sort of comments. I think many of them saw what I came to realize - I never really felt at home here. However, the general message that I got from them was that if I ever wanted to come back and work here again, all I would have to do is call. Honestly, I did not expect (and probably don't deserve) that kind of reaction, so it really took me back. I think that sheds some light on how wonderful a company Medtronic is and how great the people are there. Obviously I don't anticipate coming back to Minnesota, or I wouldn't leave in the first place - but you never know what life brings your way, and it's nice to know that if my life's journey brings me back here, I will be welcome again.

I put in my notice last Friday, so my last day will be November 5. I'll be leaving the next day and heading down to Atlanta. I start work at Optio on November 15, which gives me a week of lag in case I need time to search for an apartment in person down there. It's all very sudden, and in a way it's still kinda surreal that I will be completely out of here and back in ATL in two weeks, but I'm excited nonetheless. Good thing I'll be getting out of here before the winter strikes!

So now I begin the long journey back. Packing. Moving. Apartment hunting. Luckily I think I have a fraternity brother looking for a roommate, so we should be able to get a nice 2-bedroom apartment down in ATL which will allow me to save a little dough while preparing to buy a house. But, one thing at a time...

In other news, the ARG that I've been playing for awhile (Urban Hunt), and talked about at length in previous entries (mostly here) ended today. It lasted for a little over 3 months, and actually closed with a lot of loose threads, which is always frustrating. Nevertheless, it was tons of fun and was one of the best ARGs I've played, which is saying a lot considering it was created by a group of fellow ARG players and moderators on an undoubtably small budget. The story got quite interesting after awhile, involving mysterious deaths and secret socieites. It was the most puzzle-intensive ARG I've seen, and there were some real whoppers in there - the kind that really make your brain hurt, and then cause you to stare in amazement when someone solves them and you realize you would have never come to that conclusion in a million years. In a way, it's quite humbling...

Anyways, it's sad when one of these ends because, for those of us who played, it's been a significant part of our lives for several months, and it's like saying goodbye to old friends. But I have some great memories, especially since this was the first ARG where I was personally involved and had an effect on the course of the game. Plus I got some great parting gifts - a book of poetry from dead mental patients (written by the game creators!), a series of documents mailed to me by one of the game characters providing proof of the coverup that served as the centerpiece of the plot, and plenty of spooky voicemails. All in all it was a wonderful experience. I might take a little time off before joining in another ARG (they are extremely time-intensive and addicting), but I'm already looking forward to the next story and the alternate reality which it will allow me to experience...

A Fork In The Road

Another weekend, another trip to Wisconsin - this time, to a different place than I normally go - to participate in the annual regional tournament. I got to do a mixture of competition and officiating, and it was a lot of fun although the turnout was low. Perhaps this was a good thing because it allowed me the chance to be a center referee for one of the black belt competitions, which would have never happened (given my expertise level) if there were more people around. As far as my own participation is concerned, I think I could have done better, but I'm glad I went and tried anyways. I only had one sparring match which I lost (closely) against a larger fellow, though I have only myself to blame because he was worn down after about a minute, and I had the chance to take advantage, but I was tired myself and could not capitalize enough. It made me realize that I'm not to the physical level that I need to be for tournament competition.

I also entered the patterns competition and was upset at the outcome there because the judging is highly subjective and I feel that I am at a disadvantage when I compete against someone who trains with the people doing the judging. Since I learned my fundamentals in Florida, and most of the other competitors are from the midwest area, the judges look at them and feel they might be better because that is how they teach things. Maybe I'm being a sore loser about this, but it's the only conclusion I can come to based on the fact that I used to win these competitions all the time down in Florida. I think my chances would be greatly improved if judged by "third-party" black-belts that are not from the midwest area. But I digress...

On to the much-more important and pressing issue in my life right now. A while back I mentioned getting a call from my old boss in Atlanta who was considering offering me a job. When I worked for him the company was called Vertisoft, but they have since merged with a larger company called Optio, and he was considering bringing me on board to help get things rolling. Well, I got that job offer on Friday. I've been thinking about this whole deal since he first called me, and it's been pretty much the only thing on my mind for the last week. I'm going through all the same thought processes that I did back when I was job hunting for the first time. I think it's even tougher this time around, because this time I have two very viable options, whereas before I think I knew that Medtronic was the only right decision.

Anyways, I've always wanted to do one of those "head-to-head matchup analysis" things, and I think it will help me to get all of this out of my head and in writing. Plus it might give the interested readers a peek into the psyche of a man going through a potential major career shift.

	Strong Edge	Slight Edge	Even	Slight Edge	Strong Edge
Salary
The money is slightly better at Optio, but the key factor is that the cost-of-living and taxes in Atlanta are less than that of Minneapolis. This makes the salary amount even better than it looks on paper.
Benefits
Medtronic's benefits package is nothing short of phenomenal, but Optio's is still competitive. For most benefits (health insurance, dental insurance, retirement plan, etc.) the Medtronic version edges that from Optio (with the exception of life insurance). Optio offers a few more holidays, and also lumps all of its paid time off into "vacation time" meaning I can be more flexible with it. However, Medtronic also has a nice stock option plan and a tuition reimbursement plan while Optio does not. Medtronic gets the edge here for having a more well-defined and extremely thorough package.
Company
Medtronic is such an amazing company, and it's really hard to leave a good job. It's very well-respected and is highly stable. I have developed a good reputation in the company and am poised to do good things there. Optio, on the other hand, is smaller and is still trying to make a name for itself. There is definitely much less job stability. However, it seems like the division that I would be working in is very well-respected within the company so maybe job stability is not an issue. In addition, I prefer the company size of Optio, since it allows a good mix of large-company policies with small-company flexibility. The company size likely means more opportunities for upward mobility and being able to exert real influence over the direction of the company/division. However, Metronic gets the edge here for being proven as an excellent employer.
Co-workers
This is a tough one. I love the team I work on right now, because each member is very smart, very capable, and lots of fun. Not everyone on our project is a great software engineer, but I've now been a part of two teams and both were mostly pleasant experiences. Everyone who I know that works at Optio is stellar. I have worked with several of them in the past and they are a joy to work with, incredibly smart and creative. Another is a fraternity brother and I know that he is also excellent. I think Optio would be a slightly more fun team to work on because most of the developers are my age and work in the same way I do, but that doesn't take anything away from the great diversity of people I work with now.
Work Environment
Our project has established a great way to write software. We have a common lab environment where we all work and interact all day long. We pair on every task which I have found to be a great experience. The size of the company makes it possible for us to get all resources that we need. From talking with my friends at Optio, much work is still done in individual offices and, while communication is there, it cannot possibly be as frequent or helpful as that which is found in a lab. In addition, things outside of the division in which I would be working have not been so successful. Apparently Optio has had some trouble writing good software and determining an efficient process for doing so. This edge might change if I had first-hand experience on how Optio writes software, but for now it's hard to top Medtronic's work environment.
Location
This is a no-brainer. You all know how I miss Atlanta and have little affection for Minneapolis. The weather is a definite factor here, in addition to the size of Atlanta and the fact that I already know it and enjoy it so much.
Social Network
This is also a very one-sided category. In a year and a half here I haven't been able to develop many meaningful relationships (outside of work and Taekwon-Do), whereas I have tons of friends in the Atlanta area. There is no doubt that the amount of enjoyment in my life would go up significantly if I were living in Atlanta and were able to interact with friends much more often. In addition, I would be much closer to my family - though I don't visit them as much as they would like me to, I would be able to more often if the need ever arose.
Intangibles / Other
Another tough call here. One big point for Medtronic is my Taekwon-Do situation - there is a somewhat-thriving TKD community here in the midwest, but I have yet to find an affiliated school in the Atlanta area. Considering that TKD is an important part of my life, this is something worth considering. Though I must admit that Atlanta presents a wide-open market for me to open my own school when the time is right. Two major points on Optio's side are church options and the ability to attend Georgia Tech and Fraternity events. These would significantly help improve my spiritual and social lives. As far as intangibles are concerned, one thing that bothers me is the inconvenience I would cause to my co-workers and fellow TKD participants. I know my leaving would cause all of them more work or more hassle, and I hate to do that to anyone. However, a move would also put an end to all of the constant thinking I do about how much I miss Atlanta and the second-guessing I do. Of course, the biggest intangible is God - the ultimate decision depends on His will, and though I have earnestly asked for his guidance, I haven't felt peace about making a decision either way. Optio gets the edge for now, but I will go/stay wherever God wants me to be.
Overall

Tough, tough call. As I said before, it's so hard to leave a good situation. It's scary because you wonder if things will be worse and you don't want to be kicking yourself every day thinking "what have I done?" But, to a degree, that's what I already do - I wonder if I should have put up with the troubles of Vertisoft in order to be near friends, family, and a great city. Even in retrospect, however, I'm glad I chose the way I did - it gave me exposure to a great company, helped me understand the way large corporations do business, and earned me invaluable work experience. But all of the reasons I chose against VertiSoft have been removed - I was scared of its instability and lack of direction or process, and feared the company might fold under uncertain management. Now that it has successfully merged into a larger and more solid company, combined with its location, it's a hard opportunity to turn down.

I've always said that I don't care much about what I work on, as long as I enjoy who I work with. While the day-to-day operations of Optio might still be unclear to me, one thing is certain - the people I'd be working with are excellent. That means it's very likely my work life would be satisfying, and combined with a very satisfying social life, it adds up to a good opportunity. There are risks involved, but it seems worth it.

I was speaking with my friend Adam tonight and he made a good point: it's likely that I can't go wrong either way. I hadn't really thought of it that way - being the cynic I am, my outlook was that I would likely regret it no matter what I decided. But one thing's for sure, I'm very thankful that I've had opportunities. Many people don't get to make these kind of choices, so I consider myself lucky, no matter which way I ultimately choose.

And yet, despite all this, at this moment I know exactly how Robert Frost felt:

I ask for your prayers during this important and trying time for me...